American Arms Industry..!
Most countries round the world prefer to use American weapons, they’re surer, superior, maybe a tad costlier but work better compared to cannon and planes from Russia and elsewhere that fire only when the defense minister goes to check them out but never when enemy is required to be shot down:
“Send the MIGs up, the Chinese are coming!”
“They’re up sir, but the joy sticks won’t work unless pointed to Moscow!”
So everybody wants American guns, tanks and missiles except of course the Chinese, who buy only one American gun, imitate it, perfect it then slap on a ‘Made in China’ label.
But there’s a catch to the whole American experience.
Jimmy Carter calls the Pentagon.
“Hi! I’m Jimmy, yep the peanut farmer, I’m in Nepal at the moment, nearly hammered through a peace treaty yesterday!”
“Great Jim, we wish you well!”
“Yeah but you guys at the Pentagon are spoiling the process! You’ve gone and sold the Maoists new machine guns, night binoculars, anti air craft guns, thermal underwear and missiles?”
“Yeah Jim, it was a tough deal but it came through. We had all that stuff, especially the thermal wear lying in our back yard, now we can fill it up with some deadly stuff we can use in Iraq!”
“But boys you put paid to my peace parleys, now with these new guns they’ve started firing at the king and prime minister again?”
“Sorry Jimmy we can’t help it!”
Mush rings Bush, “I just escaped a bomb blast George!”
“Gee Mush I’m glad you did again!”
“But they’re your bombs George! Those labels showed ‘Made in America’ though we’ll tell the world they’re Indian. You sold bombs to the rebels?”
“Gee I’m sorry Mush but I needed money to get some new stuff, and these guys offered me top dollar!”
“But they fired on me George! I’m lucky the bomb didn’t go off!”
“I’m sorry Mush, but here’s what I’ll do, I’ll find out why the bomb didn’t explode. We normally sell good stuff, just check if it’s within the guarantee period and we’ll send you a replacement!”
And one day in the near future:
“Mr President Iraqi rebels are firing on American troops with American guns!”
“You don’t say! This is a great day for America, imagine folks today we have our own guns used by our troops and used against our troops! I see a day when terrorists will use American fighter planes to fly into our country to bomb targets. When this happens I expect every American to stand on his rooftop and cheer!”
“That folks will be a great day for America..!”
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