Beauty Reservations..!
I believe our girls aren’t winning beauty contests anymore!
Miss Universe contest’s just got over and I looked for Miss India on stage but someone politely told me she’d already taken the flight back the day before!
Back home, a former judge whispered in my ear, “It’s our reservation system!”
“You mean they now have reservations for beauty contests?”
“I was a local judge last year,” said the former judge, “was sitting waiting for the contestants to be announced and I remember suddenly a circular was given to each one of us. We judges at the beauty contest looked at each other stunned and aghast as we glanced at the government circular we’d just received before the contest began. I remember reading it out to all the other judges, “Fifty per cent of all the awards are to be reserved!”
“For whom?”
“Ten per cent for girls below four feet height!”
“Four feet? They’ll be trampled underfoot by the other girls if we send them for the Miss World and nobody will even know they’re missing!”
“Another ten percent for our fat, plump and obese women!”
“We’ll have to build a bigger stage!” whispered the organizer thoughtfully, “a heavy duty one!”
“Are there more reservation categories?” asked an old judge squinting at her circular but not daring to wear her spectacles.
“Oh yes! Ten percent for those with IQ’s below average!”
“What sort of questions should we ask them?” asked the same judge.
“None,” said the man who’d given the circular, “they’re in automatically!”
“We judges looked at each other angrily, “What a terrible thing for a beauty contest!”
“I wish I’d not lived to see such a day!”
“Our country is going to the dogs!”
“How will our girls compete in the international arena?”
“We should protest!”
“Burn something?”
“I’ll burn this circular!”
“I’ll burn my bra!”
“Ladies!” Ladies, there’s a last reservation you haven’t read!” said the man who’d given us the circular. “It says twenty per cent reservations for women above sixty!”
“Yippee!” we cried as we judges ran on stage, “Who wants to be a judge….”
“Three cheers for the reservation policy..!”
Now you know why India’s not winning anymore; too much reservations..!
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